Possibly we are all informed of the tragic attempt happened in Nice, last Thursday. We receive the news through all channels: TV, radio, internet, press and conversations on the street or at work.
Many times this information not only reaches adults but also the eyes and ears of children who do not know how to manage it. For them it can be threatening because they may not understand what is an attack? When will it happen again? Even adults can't predict something like that. They may not understand what has happened, if it has happened near or far from their environment. These unanswered questions can lead to anxiety, or even if the child is at an age when he has not yet thought about death, pain or suffering, he may be more strongly represented.
In addition, in this attack (as in many others, unfortunately), not only do adults die, but we can also find children and babies among the victims. This makes the news even more relevant because they can feel identified.
A few days ago, a mother explained to us how, while they were watching TV, her daughter saw the photo of the girl stretched out on the asphalt with her doll and asked her, “Mom, is that girl dead? and were there more children in that place? ” Sometimes we think that children do not listen to the news or that they do not find out anything, but when they suddenly ask us these kinds of questions and when you answer you see how they are thoughtful, you feel that perhaps it is necessary to explain what is happening .
The UTCCB (Trauma, crisis and conflict unit of the University of Barcelona) wrote an article for the Sant Joan de Déu Hospital where they explain how to react to this type of situation (in that case they talked about the Germanwings accident).
We recommend that when this type of impact news occurs, before explaining to our children what has happened without knowing if they have been exposed to the information or not, we should ask them if lately they have seen any news that has caught your attention. If they answer yes, we should ask them what they have seen, what they think the meaning of what they have seen means, what image has caught their attention the most, if they know what an attack or accident is, why they think they happen or if they know where. has occurred.
Based on the child's responses, without going any further so as not to generate new doubts, lAnd we will provide the information you need, without lying and with subtlety but without making impossible promises.
Sometimes children comment or ask things that may seem meaningless or insignificant to an adult. It is important to answer without judgment and trying to reassure him. Taking the example of someone who has experienced similar situations and are well, can minimize fear or anxiety. Make reference to the work of fire, police, ambulance, etc. It also helps them relax and trust that there are people prepared for risky situations.
On who or what generated the attack, In the article published by the UTCCB, they recommend that it is better not to go into too much detail because it can be threatening. They say that it is better to comment that for things like this to occur, several uncontrolled events have to occur, all at the same time, and that it is difficult to know if it could have been avoided.
They also give us a few examples of the questions they often ask: Does what has happened to those children hurt? What about children and other people who have injuries? Why have doctors not been able to save those children? People if they always heal us? What is dying? What about children who now have no mom or dad? What if you die? Can we live in a similar situation?
It is important, although it may seem difficult, to answer your questions. If he does not get answers, he will give them to himself or he will look for them in other children, and they are usually much more tragic than an adult can explain. Furthermore, dealing with these issues with the children makes them understand future life and situations.
It may be a good idea to reflect and prepare to be able to respond as best you can to situations as difficult as this.
From Baby Experience we want to convey our deepest condolences to all the families of the victims of this terrible attack.
